What is Unconditional Love? I imagine this is different for everyone, we all have our own take on it. Some of us have experienced it, while for others it is so far off the radar it’s not funny.
Unconditional love is divine love, it is the love that is at the core of all of us. It is love without judgment, requirements and conditions. It is a love that we all have the potential to experience but seldom do for any length of time because our ego gets in the way.
Our ego/personality creates the conditions. “I can’t love you fully because it’s not safe, you may reject me, or I may get hurt”…. “It’s happened in the past” you say, so you’ve learnt it may happen again! Or perhaps it’s, “I can’t love you unconditionally because I have judgments that in some way you don’t deserve and so I must hold back.”
Radiant Love Givers
Unconditional love is often first truly experienced between a baby and parent. In those early months and years, the baby is simply a ‘baby without an agenda’ (except to get its basic needs met of course). Once their needs are met, babies are radiant love givers. In these early days their soul’s bright presence allows unconditional love to flow, because the ego/personality has not yet developed. The child can continue to share unconditional love as long as he/she feels safe to do so. These are the special bonds of some parental relationships.
Loyal Love Returned
So how do we return to unconditional love outside of this parental connection? I think the person-dog relationship is a great role model. You’ve heard the statement ‘A dog is his master’s best friend’. The dog wants to serve and love and is incredibly loyal. You offer love to a dog and he knows it’s possible and keeps coming back for more. If you get busy and don’t give him the attention he deserves, he forgives you straight away when he sees you walk in with his lead in your hand! His forgiveness is immediate and he has a look on his face that says lets go for that walk together NOW, not next week when I’ve processed this terrible experience! I forgive you NOW, and lets get on with our relationship. I love you no matter what.
Now I can hear you say …… hang on, … you’re saying someone can continue to treat me badly and I just forgive and move on. No, that’s not what I am implying. Of course the way in which we treat each other needs to be mutually acceptable, and when it’s not, discussions and boundaries need to be put in place to get to that acceptable point. However, once you achieve this outcome, then forgiveness and moving on with unconditional love is the highest calling. Not holding on to past wounds or judgments, rather, moving forward with unconditional love.
Love at our Core
Here is the concept that I use for unconditional love: At the core of who I am, I feel love for everyone and everything. When I’m aligned and in this centered and peaceful state, I can forgive with divine ease and grace. I simply want to serve others and enjoy relationships sharing unconditional love. From my centred place I can witness the pain of others with compassion, and understand that their judgments and wounding actions come from their own wounded nature.
When I’m pulled off centre and get caught up in my ego, I lose sight of any compassion for another’s wounds. Their judgment hits home and my own ego wounds play out. I retreat and hold back, and not give any love, conditional or otherwise.
So the answer is finding your core, your centre, that soul peaceful place within you. Let past wounds be in the past. The more you can cultivate this deep connection with yourself, the easier it is to experience unconditional love for yourself and for others. Life will begin to reflect this intention and give you opportunities to experience deep love connections from those around you.
The Intentional Dance
As with all things it’s a dance between polarities, sometimes feeling unconditional love, sometimes not. Once the intention is set to appreciate the deepest experience of love and share it with another (or all), life can divinely line up experiences for you to explore this potential.
Want to know more about finding your centre, your Core Wisdom, contact Mandy.